Tuesday, February 27, 2007

Waiting Room

So, I finally got to the R.E.'s today. I was just having an u/s to see if my cyst went away.

Well, the cyst went away. So, now I stop the birth control pills and wait for my period.

I am trying injectibles this cycle since they're covered and I decided I may as well make this IUI and the two more IUIs I'd originally planned really count. But apparently, that's not what my clinic had in store for me.

Ta da... I got handed IVF consent forms to read over today.

Now, I know I'm not the first woman who's had IVF suggested to them after 4 unsuccessful IUIs (I've only had 3--it was suggested that I consider if it this IUI doesn't work), but seriously, I thought 6 IUIs was the standard. I'm a 33-year-old, relatively healthy woman (asthma, allergies, and hypothyroidism notwithstanding) who did just fine on every fertility test they threw at me. But Nurse Poker Face said if it doesn't *take* in 3-4 IUIs, then it means IUIs may not be a way I'm going to get pg.

I'm actually not angry or upset about this turn of events at all. I've accepted that my clinic is ultra-aggressive and I fully expected that they'd throw IVF at me soon. Not quite this soon, but... it didn't throw me. And I don't know what they would say if I pushed for 2 more IUIs first. We have the name of another clinic we would consider using if he didn't agree to 2 more IUIs. We might even consider switching regardless, but we have 3 vials of sperm at the lab our RE uses, so it might be an expensive switch.

I find the "it should work in 3-4 IUIs" rule especially funny juxtaposed with my het and married friend, CF, going to her GYN's after 4 or 5 months of TTC and being laughed at for being worried. "Come back if it hasn't happened in a year," she was reassured.

Oh, to have that kind of reassurance. I think in part the IVF suggestion didn't throw me because nothing except a pregnancy will reassure me, at this point. I just don't perceive myself as potentially fertile any more. At all. I know that's insane. But it's how I feel.

In other news, we have another possibility on our TTC horizon. I won't post much about it, but we have a potential known donor option to explore. Not someone we asked. Someone who offered. Someone we would feel good about making part of our family.

I'm not going to say much about that. I'll wait for Lo to post more on that, since this is through her connections, not mine. We haven't even officially talked to our new PKD yet, so if we explore this, it'll be a while before anything comes of it. We would definitely want to meet with him and his partner and talk some more about this. We would want a contract drawn up (for both his and our protection) and such. And since he and his partner live about 4 hours away, working all this out logistically will not be easy. I am not sure if we could even try insems until the summer, since Lo's job doesn't allow her to just take off for a few days in the middle of the week or something.

I know we all have our personal bents about this TTC stuff. But please don't be super excited about the PKD sitch yet. It's a long way from actually happening.

I would really like it if the PKD route worked out and feel really positive about this particular PKD. But, I kind of feel like if we go that route, we should switch to Lo. I wouldn't be unwilling to try. But, as I said earlier, I just don't know that it's worth trying with me.


Oh, and I'm waiting to get the table of contents for my next book. I don't think I'm getting it for another few days. Which means I have no work to do.

While I sorely need a rest after my last project from hell, this week really isn't ideal for lots of down time. I'd much prefer it were a weekend when I could hang with Lo and when I didn't have so much on my mind.


Mermaidgrrrl said...

They want to do IVF after only 3 IUI's? OMFG! The "average" time to conceive using frozen sperm is 12 months. My doctor was thrilled that I conceived "so soon" on the fifth attempt. I would seriously question your doctor about how they can justify this level of intervention at this stage. It sounds all wrong to me!

Melody said...

I'm surprised they're suggesting it this early, too. I figure we'll do 3 cycles of injectables, and if that doesn't work, we'll move on to IVF. That seems to be the standard protocol at my RE's.

I can't imagine they wouldn't let you move ahead with a couple more cycles on injectables. It's your money, your sperm, your body.

Good luck this cycle. It sounds like we'll be going through approximately the same thing at the same time. My baseline u/s is tomorrow (CD3).