Thursday, May 21, 2009

The RE Report

Yesterday was supposed to be my whirlwind of three doctor's appointments; in the end all but one was cancelled. It was the big one that went through, though, with the clinic I suspected I would like.

The clinic is bigger than the one we used with Co -- they sent me a folder of paperwork to read in advance of the appointment, and sent me home with two more! -- but the up side of having been through all this before (by proxy) is that I didn't find it intimidating. There were a lot of straight couples there who seemed pretty intense and stressed out (some kind of educational seminar had just ended). I can imagine it must be much worse to end up in a clinic when you thought you'd be babydancing; Co and I always knew our baby's beginning would be in a lab.

Dr. Paisan (Sophia has already named him for us) was positively lovely. He was chatty and funny and sweet, a far cry from Dr. Quick, who got the job done but whose longest speech was "Sperm is going in" (to be fair, he became much more personable once Co was pregnant). He said that from his perspective, I was young and healthy with no known fertility problems and should absolutely be able to get pregnant. When I asked about weight -- I had to ask about it! -- he shrugged and said it shouldn't be a problem in an otherwise healthy woman.

I went in convinced I should start with IVF (I exaggerate, but only slightly) but he said natural cycles (as in, not even a trigger) should be just fine, again, since I am so healthy and young. It was really a twist of the kaleidoscope to hear his optimism and think of myself as someone with so much potential.

As luck would have it, yesterday was cd2, so I went right downstairs for my bloodwork. Dr. Paisan called today with the results -- he said that everything was fine with the exception of the estradiol, which was elevated. He likes to see less than 70 on cd2, and mine was (I believe) 124. He said that it probably means I have a leftover cyst from a previous cycle. In some rare cases it can mean that ovarian reserve is compromised, but he doesn't think that's likely. My MIS results will be in Thursday and that will tell us more.

I had cd3 bloods done once before and had a scare about infertility. Ultimately that doctor ended up saying everything was normal, but she too was concerned about a high estradiol level, and called me to say I had the ovaries of a menopausal woman. (Looking back at those posts, she said that estradiol had to be below 32, which seems very wrong, though she correctly called my FSH of 5.7 normal. I don't know what my FSH was this time around...didn't ask.)

So, I'm anxious. I'm trying not to be too anxious, but the kaleidoscope has turned again. I want to have a pregnancy. I've wanted it my whole remembered life and I've had intense pregnancy dreams since I was 13 years old. But I've come to be a good non-bio mom. I know how to do it. Maybe that's my lot in life. That wouldn't be the worst thing.

Yesterday I was wondering if I could get all my testing done in time to start next cycle. Now I'm thinking I'll never get to be a bio mom. But one thing's for sure: TTC with a toddler in the house is much, much less painful.


calliope said...

I am so mad at myself for getting behind in blogs and missing this post as soon as you posted it. And while I am no RE I am a bit of an expert at wonky E2 levels.
And here is where I am going to tell you something that it took 3 years for someone to tell me- fluffy girls sometimes just have higher estrogen. Estrogen is within the fluff and when we have base blood levels done it can read higher than average. If everything else is normal level and you are ovulating without issues then you should assume that everything is fine (until proven otherwise, heh)

But seriously- do NOT fret about this. I LOVE this RE that was honest and real about weight and reproduction. Sure- it CAN be an issue- but it clearly is not for you. You are healthy. And if the ONLY thing that is wonky is this hormone level then you should be great.

Like I said my levels were always a bit elevated (even when I was going through the shared egg program and was tested out the wazzzzoooo!) and things were fine.

I also think if you don't want to do a lot of "natural" cycles (because you have walked down this path with Co and you know the emotional chaos that comes with trying) that you should speak up and ask to jump to medical intervention- maybe that means monitoring with drugs or maybe that just means monitoring- but if you want it you should ask for it.

I am getting SO SO SO SO excited for ya'll!

& sorry for writing an epic comment...

babypants said...

I am so excited that you guys are working on baby #2. I hope that E2 levels end up being okay and I am really happy that the RE did not make a big deal about weight. xoxo L.

The Fonaholics said...

Oh Lo, I wholehearted agree with Cali, Kims was a little high too on her baseline, our doc put it down to her being around 20kgs overweight (although i think she would look stupid at 60kgs). You will be fine sweety, great FSH level too!! Mine was 6.4!!